What Is a Unicorn in Dating? Meaning, Etiquette and Tips
What does unicorn mean in dating and the swinging lifestyle? The meaning, why unicorns are rare, and how couples and unicorns can make it a great experience.
By the Pineapple Lifestyle team · · 2 min read
If you've spent any time on swinger or open-relationship apps, you've seen the word unicorn. Here's what it means and how to approach unicorn dating respectfully — whether you're a couple or a unicorn yourself.
What is a unicorn?
A unicorn is a single person who joins an existing couple for dates, sex or a relationship. Most often the term describes a bisexual woman who is interested in both partners of a male-female couple, but people of any gender can be unicorns.
The name comes from how rare they can feel: lots of couples are looking for one, while comparatively few singles are looking to join a couple.
Unicorn hunting
Unicorn hunting describes a couple searching for a third. It's not a bad thing in itself — but the phrase sometimes carries negative connotations because some couples treat a third as an accessory rather than a person. Avoid that, and you'll have far more luck.
Tips for couples looking for a unicorn
- Be a genuine, verified couple. On Pineapple, you link your profiles so singles know you're real.
- Make sure you both want this equally. Unicorns can tell when one partner is reluctant.
- Be honest about your rules — what's allowed, whether you're looking for a one-off or something ongoing.
- Treat the unicorn as a person. Their pleasure, comfort and boundaries matter as much as yours.
- Don't expect them to be "into both of you equally" on demand. Chemistry can't be forced.
- Meet in public first, and let the unicorn choose the venue.
Tips for unicorns
- You're in control. Take as long as you like chatting before meeting.
- Talk to both partners. If only one ever replies, ask why.
- Ask about their rules up front — and what happens if feelings get complicated.
- Use a verified platform and block or report anyone who makes you uncomfortable. Read our tips on staying safe.
Related terms
- Bull — a single man who plays with a couple, often focused on the woman.
- Third — a more neutral term for any single person joining a couple.
- Triad / throuple — three people in an ongoing relationship together.
Find your unicorn — or your couple
Pineapple Lifestyle connects verified couples with open-minded singles in a respectful, consent-first community. Learn more about unicorns on Pineapple.
